Wednesday, July 30, 2008
share it in hospitality. . .
A stroll around their farm. . . and we headed back home. . .
Monday, July 28, 2008
The other day on the boat we talked about how our relationship began and the times that the sea seemed a bit rough. We talked about how much we are the same, truly kindred spirits and the time it took to really understand each other.
I cherish this relationship because it has been tested and we have learned to constructively resolve our conflicts and where there was hurt we truly forgave and found reconciliation.
In our early years of friendship we were nearly inseparable. We met in 1979 and we had our babies within months of one another nurseing them side by side day in and day out. We lived within a few blocks of one another and then in the summer of 1986 we moved next door to one another. In 1986 when the Space Shuttle disaster happened I rushed over to her house so that we could watch the coverage together. I learned to drink coffee at her house, and we would often say in the morning, come over for dinner. We attended the same church and had many of the same friends.
When my husband needed to go into the Vancouver for cancer treatment she and her husband stood vigil, babysitting and helping with meals.
Sometimes though too much of a good thing can become the problem itself. Looking back, we can easily see that the moving next door to one another was probably our biggest challenge. Jealousy, insecurity and mistrust bounced back and forth over the fence and though we never completely withdrew our friendship from one another, it became strained.
They eventually moved to another town and we moved to the farm. For a time the phone calls were less often, but our love for hospitality never stopped and dinner at each others houses, always a treat still happened several times a year.
Both of us wanted the relationship to work and by God's grace we slowly grew to the friendship we enjoy today.
I appreciate and value Kathy's perspective. Our different life experiences are a treasure chest for each other. I had boys and she had girls. I can glean wisdom from her and I know that she also wants to learn from me. I know that she wants our family to succeed, she hopes the best for us and I also hope that for her family.
We don't push each others buttons anymore. . .
oh if I could take back the times I did that.
I am amazed at God's goodness in this friendship. So often while I was reading this book I felt God nudging me in areas that I still need to grow up in other friendships. Every relationship that we have is a bit different because we relate a little differently to each person. Just because I can get my act together with one friend, doesn't mean that I have it all together in all my friendships.
While I am using Kathy as a real life example in my post today there are other relationships that I still need to work on, places where I need to allow God to change my heart. I really can honestly say that God is not finished with me yet.
As I read the book, I felt encouraged, challenged, a bit defeated, disappointed in myself and increasingly more determined as I read the questions at the end of each chapter.
That afternoon on the boat, Kathy and I talked about how occasionally someone will still ask us individually if we see each other? Clearly the question reveals and indicates that our friendship in its infancy stage was visible to other friends.
I've wondered at times at my personality. The book talks about this as well. Until we understand ourselves and identify the condition of our hearts and our motives . . .we'll keep walking in circles in our relationships. We need to understand that our capacity to love others comes from the Lord and not our own creation.
It is so hard to admit fault isn't it? Whether your challenges are with your spouse, children, extended family or your friends, you want it to be better .. . .don't you?
Maybe reading this right now, a relationship with a girlfriend comes to mind and you feel hurt or guilty . . and wonder if your friend feels the same. You might wonder if reconciliation is possible. I pray for you that you will be able to resolve your issues as far as it depends upon you.
I have found that I like myself more since I've done some attitude adjusting in my expectations in various girlfriend relationships. Since I've purposed to give grace where before I nursed hurt, where I once chose to be cynical I now try to be trusting, I feel more at peace.
The girls that wrote this book really do seem to have their relationships figured out. I admired their honesty and their frank discussion in their many examples.
I shared with Kathy that I felt led to write about this topic but I wondered how I would do that without talking about specifics, implicating others. The authors talked quite specifically in the book about various relationships. Kathy graciously gave me permission to talk about us. I thought, wow, how kind and how trusting of her to give me the freedom to tell about our friendship from my perspective.
She shares my hope that young women can learn to enjoy grown-up friendships avoiding the pitfalls that so often plagues relationships. She agrees that when God truly is the center of a relationship, it is a wonderful thing.
Learning to be gracious on both ends of the friendship on the journey is a dance and an act of selfless love.
The rewards that comes with being a friend like the Bible talks about are profound.
Knowing that someone is really happy for you when you are happy. .
knowing that someone is sad for you when you are very sad. . .
knowing that someone is willing to take your phone call even when they are busy ..
knowing that someone chooses to listen and tries to understand your viewpoint even when it is different than her own. . is an incredible blessing.
This book has also helped me to understand that not all my girl friend relationships will be at an intimate level of sharing all that is in my heart.
It is good and healthy to have different levels of intimacy.
With some friends we share cliches. . . ie. ..how are you today. . isn't the weather lovely. .
with some we share facts. . .ie. . I have two sons who are married and I have grand babies. .
with some we share opinions and others our hopes and dreams.
With others we share our feelings and maybe our faults, fears and failures. .
and then with a select few we share our real needs.
As I sat writing this post I stopped to think about so many of my girlfriends and the indescribable richness of what they have brought to my life.
"No prolonged infancies among us please. We'll not tolerate babes in the woods, small children who are an easy mark for imposters. God wants us to grow up, to know the whole truth and tell it in love ~~ like Christ in everything. We take our lead from Christ, who is the source of everything we do. He keeps us in step with each other. His very breath and blood flow through us, nourishing us so that we will grow up healthy in God, robust in love"
Ephesians 4 14-16 The Message
Last but not least. . .thank you to our wonderful husbands for the comic relief in today's pictures. . .picking good husbands is something we have always agreed about .. .ours are the best. PS Kathy's husband looks nothing like Homer.
Kathy's response from the comment page. .
Thank you for your kind words about me this morning. I remember one of the cards you wrote to me some years back that said "thank you for loving me when I was lovable, but especially when I was not." That little sentance has stayed with me. I have often thought about that and I too have over the years felt loved from you when I know you must have had to work hard to show grace when I was unlovely.
Scot and I have enjoyed our frinedship with you and Terry over the years. We have such wonderful memories that far outway any of our hickups.
I loved the truth in Charlotte's poem about friends. (check out her blog -Here I Stand) I am so rich with many frienships, and each have brought something different my way. Some have been deep, some casual. I want my friends to feel valued and respected. I want to build up my friends and encourage them where they are at, not where I think they should be at. I want them to have the right to speak the truth into my life and help me along when they see I need a loving word of reproach or encouragement.
I am grateful for you Lovella for loving me where I am, and encouraging me to be better, to grow in my walk with the Lord, to love my family more, to live life to the fullest. Thanks for the journey we as friends are walking together. Thanks for forgiving me when I have hurt you.
I hope we can be a testimony of God's love to the world of girls out there who long for healthy relationships. Honestly, I have some friendships I need to pour into more, I need to work at harder, and some that I need to mend alittle.
I love to laugh and do it out loud! That we did Friday on the boat. I just love the way you 'honored' Scot in the pictures. Girls...let your hair down abit and have fun with your friends. Don't be so serious! Oh and having two goofs along really helps. Last year Scot brought his inflatable boat and the guys had about the same fun with that as they did with the belly boat this year.
I can only imagine camping this summer. I already know what the new fun toy is for that trip and it scares me abit. I am not a target! More fun, more memories. This is not my blog so I better sign off. Thanks for investing in our friendship Lovella.
I love you! Kathy
Have a wonderful day my friends, I'll be posting again on Wednesday.
Saturday, July 26, 2008
Friday, July 25, 2008
- 1/2 cup lemon juice
- 1/2 cup vegetable oil
- 1/2 cup balsamic vinegar
- 1 teaspoon fresh ground pepper
- 1 teaspoon fresh ground salt
- 3 tablespoons minced garlic
- 1 can cola
- 1/2 cup Worcestershire sauce
Put your large zip loc bag inside a measuring cup, folding the edges over the cup. Add all the ingredients into the bag.
Remove the bag from the measuring cup careful not to spill. Add a 4-5 pound sirloin beef roast.
Seal the bag, put the bag in a bowl and put it in the refrigerator for up to 24 hours.
Let the roast sit at room temperature 1 hour before putting on the grill.
Tie the roast onto your rotisserie. Preheat the grill to 400 and insert the rotisserie onto the grill. Add a drip pan underneath with 1 cup of water, check to make sure the water doesn't run dry, or you will have very scorched drippings.
Grill with the lid closed for 1 hour, check the temperature. You will aim to have the internal temp at 135 - 140. We let ours cook to 154 and it was completely done, no pink left. Next time we will take it off the grill at 140. Remove from the heat and wrap in foil for 15 minutes.
During the resting time we grilled our chopped up veggies in a grill basket. I simply toss the veggies with veggie seasoning and olive oil and stir them once in a while. They only need 10 - 15 minutes on the grill.
Now here is the funny thing, I just realized now that I'm on my What Matters Most blog. . .I meant to be on the cooking blog. .oh well, I'll copy and paste it later. . .
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Fifty years ago today my beloved eased himself into the world with not much fuss nor bother. His mom says that when her labor started, she jumped off the front porch and headed to the hospital .. and he was born not long after.
He has continued on this path of not being a bother.
A little quiet, a little shy . . .until you know him well.
I'm quite certain I know him better than anyone. . .after all we met when he was but a pup.
At fifteen years of age he declared his love, and at nineteen he proposed and at twenty he was a happily married
When he was twenty one I made him a Daddy and I repeated that a year and a half later.
Six weeks later he was diagnosed with Hodgkin's Disease. . a cancer of the lymph nodes.
After many biopsies and other decidedly not nice things, he was given a round of radiation.
Surviving that, he moaned and groaned that his tummy hurt. . .I took him to the ER where they did tests and declared his appendix ruptured. . . but he lived.
A year or so later, he broke his leg playing baseball and rode his motorcycle home to ask for a ride to the hospital. He enjoyed the summer off, and upon his return to work within the first hour he accidentally stabbed himself in his thigh with a box cutter. . .. . and ended up in pediatrics for the night where his oldest son was occupying a bed after a tonsillectomy.
( he needed surgery and since the hospital was plum full they stuck him in with the kids)
A few years later he broke his wrist skiing and now
Thirteen years ago we moved to a farm that was in need of his tender loving care.
He realized his dreams that first year on the farm.
His dream was colorful and included rodents that generally turn up in others nightmares.
He was not easily deterred and after winning the war with the unkempt farm. . .
he took a deep breath.
Hard work and the blessing of the opportunity has paid off and now he happily manages our farm.
My beloved has seen sickness and health,
he has known counting pennies and he has been blessed to have enough.
He is not an old man, nor is he a young man.
He is firmly married to his high school sweetheart.
He has two sons who he admires.
He has two daughters by love who have given him two of the greatest joys in life. . . those darling grand babies.
He is a farmer by occupation and a putter. . er by inclination.
I so hope we grow
I'd be quite happy to roll out noodles for him the rest of my life.
We've already been so blessed. ..
Lord, bless and keep this man that you have given me. . .
make your face to shine upon him. . .
Have a wonderful day my friends. . .
we've been celebrating little bits here and there all week long and having such fun along the way.
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Monday, July 21, 2008
Friday, July 18, 2008
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Who can resist pausing when walking across train tracks?
Who can resist the beauty of golden grasses set against lush green pastures?
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
What I want to say though to you is this. . .
I could have just as easily been born into another family with another church background and my salvation still would only be dependent on one thing. While I believe that there are many believers from different congregations from different churches that will spend eternity together. . .it is the common belief in Jesus who is the son of God that binds us together. It is not the founder of the Mennonite Church nor the founder of any other church that gives me assurance of faith.
My assurance comes from the Bible telling me that if I believe that Jesus is the son of God and if I believe that he died because he loved me to save me from my sins .. .and then further believe that he rose from the dead and ascended to heaven and will someday come back to get me. . and others that believe in him. Though we live in a world that seems to be out of control I believe that God loves us so much that he has provided a way for us to spend not only the short time here on earth living. . but all of eternity. I can't begin to wrap my mind around that time frame but I choose to believe what the Bible says about it.
I always love the way Billy Graham says in answer to sometimes prickly questions. . .He says. .
"The Bible says. . ." and then he goes on to quote what God says in his word. Either you know some of those scriptures off by heart or you have never heard one of them and if you do wonder about those verses. . email me. . I'd be delighted to share those parts of the Bible with you.
Monday, July 14, 2008
I've been mulling so many things over in my mind lately. About blogging, about friendships, and really about my faith and how that looks. . .day to day. I want to talk more about that this week, but it's Monday and I'll start out a little less complicated.
Let's talk about the blueberries. . .have you seen any fresh ones yet? I moseyed over to the field next door and came home with a small basket.
And then I made these. Blueberry crumble buns. . .We used to have a Bread Garden in town. . .and I had one of these nearly every week. Well, it was different. .it had more a croissant dough .. but no matter .. I tried to copycat it on Saturday and I think they are quite good. Run on over to Mennonite Girls Can Cook. . to see how they look when they come out of the oven.
Come back tomorrow. . maybe I'll get into some of the things that I've been mulling over. .. let's start with my faith. . or maybe the friendships.. . .I'll have to sleep on it. . .
Have a wonderful day my friends.