Friday, May 8, 2009

1965

(From my mom's life story. .. which she finished the year before she passed away in 1995.)
"You started school in the fall of 1965. I had kind of looked forward to having an uninterrupted morning. . . but it was not at all the way I had thought.
I had taken you to school in the morning. . you had rather wanted to go with the bus because you were a big girl now. . .it was very hard to leave you there.
I had to go home by myself.
Instead of quickly going about my work. . .I stood at the kitchen window waiting for the bus that would bring you home at noon.
I have treasured this poem ever since the day you started school."
Scrubbed and shining from top to toe . .
she stands on the doorstep ready to go.
Pencil and notebook, lunch box and rule,
six years old and going to school.
Pink ribbon bows on short brown curls
Just like dozens of other wee girls.
Happy, excited, laughing and gay,
All of them starting to school today.
Dozens of mothers saying goodbye . ..
with a panicky feeling- they'd like to cry.
The work will be finished up early today
No body to beg you to stop and play.
No question box with earnest brown eyes
No endless what's this? and how? and why?
No pinafored helper with dishes today . .
chattering on in her merry way.
No - she's not the one who will feel alone . .
The first day she's really on her own.
Well mom. . .today I feel alone. . .
fourteen years is a long time to be without you.
I was blessed to have you as long as I did. . .
and yet. .
one can always wonder what it would be like if you could see me now. .
OH. . you'd love the wee ones.
You would find your way to cousin camp. .
and if your hands still could. .
you'd already be sewing little dolly clothes for grandgirlie. .
and jammies for the lil' farm hands . . . "moosey".
Instead. . .I'll just know that you would. . .
if you could .. .
and remember all the things I loved about you.
No regrets.. . .
All for now. . .


17 comments:

  1. I'm all choked up at reading this...it's absolutely beautiful.

    What a wonderful reminder to those of us who still have our mothers to treasure them and talk often with them...and let them know they are loved.

    Be blessed, Lovella...and know that your mother would be so proud of you!

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  2. This is such a beautiful tribute. I started kindergarten in 1965, but our experience was different - Mama was a HS teacher, so she was already there.

    You have a sweet litle blog, and I look forward to exploring.

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  3. Aww Lovella that is such a wonderful poem! Brought tears to my eyes..
    So wonderful to have your Mom's writings..I'm sure you cherish every word!
    Blessings..

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  4. Now look what you've done, Lovella, you've made us all cry. Even so, they are sweet tears. I can't imagine not having my mother in my life, though I've been imagining it all too often this past week. Your precious mother sounds like the most amazing one and how special is this book she wrote with these wonderful memories of you recorded. Makes me wish that I had done better with my own memories.

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  5. How precious that collection of your mother's words must be. I think we can all see where your gift of writing comes from.
    I think your mom must be very satisfied to know that you are the mom and grandma that you are!

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  6. Oh what to say here...this is so beautiful, Lovella. What a blessing that she took the time to leave this for you.
    Thank you for the reminder to strive to be the person I should be today, both as a mother and Nana.

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  7. Oh my this is such a wonderful tribute. What a great poem and words from your mom about this day so long ago. I'm typing with tears...
    Have a wonderful weekend and Mother's Day Lovella!!

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  8. A beautiful and moving Mother's Day tribute, Lovella! You've got us all pulling out the Kleenex.

    And to have a collection of your mom's writings is something to be treasured.

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  9. Lovella, everything got rather blurry by the time I finished reading this! Beautiful post!

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  10. What a lovely post! Wow -- 14 years is a long time to be without your mom. My mom lost her mom long before I was born and she often would have the kinds of memories you shared today. I know my mom wished her mom could have met us and I wish that too. We are blessed to have her diaires, which helps a bit. i can't imagine what it was like for my mom to go through motherhood without enjoying having her mom around to call or visit. I'm very thankful I have the chance to be in the same town just now that my mom is in. And I know your boys must be so grateful to have you so close!

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  11. My mom died almost 18 years ago - Our baby,Sarah, was only 9 mos. Mom missed so much of my younger children's lives. I often thought how much she would have enjoyed seeing them grow up. I miss her often yet I have such lovely memories to treasure. You express it very well when you write:

    "Instead. .I'll just know that you would. . .if you could .. .and remember all the things I loved about you. No regrets"

    Thanks for such a loving Mother's Day tribute.

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  12. PS - Love that new apple blossom banner!

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  13. Ah Lovella, 14 years is a long time. I'm thankful you had a mom so worth missing. Perhaps she gets a happy peek from her heavenly vantage point. What love she shares in her words. Beautiful!

    Bless you.

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  14. Knowing a bit about your mom's journey to Canada...I wonder how her mom felt about leaving her homeland and relatives behind. What a comfort to know that your Mother is eternally safe...no worries, no fears for her, and an eternity ahead to catch up.

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  15. Ohh Lovella.. how sweet and sad and lovely !!
    and YES a tear jerker !!
    Yes your Mom would love the wee ones... and I can just see her saying to your Dad.."Lovella has cousin camp today.. I think we should take a drive over!"

    I'm sorry she was taken away from you soo soon !!
    but I know how much she loved you ! I can still hear her voice, filled with love and pride,saying your name when she was talking about you !!!!

    Happy Mother's Day , Lovella !!

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  16. My heart broke for you as I read this post. Oh, I just know your mother would love to see you now. Mother's Day must be such a difficult time for you. It brings to my heart the thought that I need to write down my thoughts for my girls. How special that she did that for you. She would definitely be proud of you and the woman that you have become.

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  17. What a sweet poem. I can relate to that poem as a mom of two girls. You and your mom had a special relationship, and I know she would have been tickled pink to see you on the farm, with your kids and your grandkids. So glad you have her journals and the memories. Kathy

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Thank you!